Tuesday, November 10, 2015

Being strong bukan jadi semalaman


10 November 2015

Wow. A month to go for 2016. How time flies. 

I kind of tired tapi I nak jugak menaip sebelum lupa. Masuk kali ni dah tiga kali typo mengantuk punya pasal. Two more minutes. Two more minutes. 

These days people dok sembang pasal politic and economy. I am sooo keen to talk about that tapi I rasa tak payah lah kot cakap kat sini. Entri sebelum sebelum ni dah boring enough tak payah lah I nak make it worse. Hehehe

Back to the topic. Lately I am sooo much into being a strong woman. Indeed dah years sebenarnya. Cuma lately ni I banyak kali ulang. Dulu tak beria sangat. Hahahaha. 

I am fine. Sampai kadang kadang I really thought I am fine. People surronding beria tanya why seems different lah. Kenapa nampak sedih lah. I pun at times keliru. Am I really okay atau I tertipu dengan my own mind control. Okayyyyyy dah lah cakap sorang macam psiko pulak. 

One thing I am confident about. I am a broken pieces. I am yet to complete. Tapi I am fine. Fine kalau good thing happen to me I choose tak share dengan siapa siapa. Bad things apatah lagi. I choose to spend more alone time than be with friends yang present but not there. 

Nope, there is nothing wrong with them. I choose to be a lone ranger and I am okay with it. Sometimes I do get lonely tapi still bearable. I am still okay. 

Wish me luck. I am indeed an easy person with complicated mind. 

I just want to be strong. 

Diktator rebel dan sekutunya

30 August 2015


The other day I was in deep conversation dengan my friend. We argue on is it necessary to put kpi on top of our own integrity. 

I beria reject. 

I asked him, katalah u buat apa saja boss u nak for the sake of to pleased them which  eventually will lead u to better KPIs. Tapi at same time u kena tolak tepi believes u. Philosophy u. Integrity u. As human. Would u really feel better? Really really feel better? 

For example, I nak jual produk. I know kalau I bukak semua cerita memang orang taknak beli produk I. Since KPI I being measured on banyak mana I jual this produk so I ended up goreng my client. Cerita yang best best je. Yes, I might sell a lot. Because I know I can convince people very well. But did this make me feel better? I am not being honest to myself to my clients. I did all this to save my own ass. Did I feel better? 

Yeah we did argue on kita ni makan gaji je. Keje pun sebab nak duit bla bla bla. I must admit I can't stand this people. Bila I insist on bagitaw je baik buruk this produk and let client decide whether  they want it or not, dia keeps on coming back to KPIs lah nanti boss bising lah. Nanti takde sales bla bla bla. 

For god sake. 

I would rather be go out and meet my clients. I would rather tell all the pros and cons. Of course I love this job. I love what I am doing. I won't be telling product which I would never bought for myself. But I still want to be realistic. This product do have flaws. But pros will always supersit the cons. No worries. 

Close or not I really don't give a damn. I am satisfy just because I did want I believe right. Target is one thing. Without it we surely jadi headless chicken, takde direction. Agreed. Tapi semata nak meet this target I nak kena put aside what I believe right I doubt I will feel better sekalipun I meet my target. Pointless right. Especially bila you work ur ass out sampai beria goreng orang sekali untung semua dapat kat company. 

Thanks but no thanks. 

Till then,


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